i broke down into tears wen tiz happens juz now..
me: mummy.. i improved my maths alot!
mum: how much u get?
me: A1 for my latest maths test. i used to fail wat.
but now, i pass. im happy seh.
mum: mayb u copied.
me: how can i copy during a test?
how would u feel if u were in my place? haish. i juz walked out of e room in tears. she saw nth. watz wrong wif her?! does it mean tt sec1 & 2 i've been failin maths, i'll keep on failin ritez? cant i b betta? here i am revising for all my tests & all she said was.. i copied? copied?!! does she evn noe how i feel? im not a doll. i hav feelings! mayb she still expects to hear her daughter saein.. "mummy.. i failed my maths test agn." mayb tts wat she wants. den she'll noe tt i didnt copy. & she'll b satisfied. by saein tt i got A1.. itz an unbelievable thing for her. yaa, it iz unbelivable to me oso. i didnt expect to pass either. but i studied hard & i did my best. cant she juz b happy for me? i noe i've been failing my fcukin worst subject, maths.. but im tryin my best to work harder. i've told myself durin e start of e yr tt i must at least pass my maths. & i did. mayb she dun hav to b happy for me. no one wud either. i havent tell my dad bout it.. i wont. itz betta to shuddup den havin my mum to talk more bout it later. im not tryin to b rude. but itz juz soo hurtful..
my parents r very naggy nowadays. itz owaes me & my bro who gets e scoldings. my father iz stressing on e fact tt my bro iz cumin home late lately. but itz bcoz he got his own soccer tournament! not tt he goes out wif his gf or smth wat. & sumtymz my dad will think tt my bro actuali lied. why cant they juz understand? im siding my bro cuz i noe hez not wrong in tiz matter. they r juz unsupportive parents of us. poor thing not onli my bro gets scoldings, i get it evrytym oso. juz lyk him. my father keeps on askin why my bro cum home late? obviously he got match ritez. he evn got e schedule for his soccer matches.. why dont they evn bother to see it? sheesh. all they do iz scold scold scold. & he kept on saein.. "u think u commit urself into soccer most of e tym.. gd iz it? it wont reali bring u far wen u're old." i can see tt he iz sick of hearin tt. & my dad expects my bro to commit himself more into silat? cuz tt one he can go far. watz e diff seh? den me.. netball iz worst. he'll ask me why i join netball in e first place? u shud hav joined an individual sport. cuz netball iz an unpopular sport, according to him. mayb i agree. im in netball since pri sch. why sae onli now at sec3?? mayb i understand why. now i hav alot of trainings plus matches. tts why it seems tt i hav no tym for any other stuff. but im e person.. i noe myself. itz not tt i can quit netball ritez? if can.. i will. i'll hav to b straight forward. i will quit! i cant take it anymore. im reali sick n tired of evrythin. might as well i bcum cca-less. i'll b free wat. no more naggings frm u. i shall b home very early evry single dae. u'll b happy wat. i hav parents who dun understand their children..
& u.. im sorie if i've owaes caused problems to us. but i hav no choice. wat can i do? tell me. help me. im reali stuck wif all tiz. i need u.. will u b there?
bye. =((
